Trumpometer 

I was confused at the Trump Bargain Barn.

Should I purchase golden-ankle sneakers?

A Trump bomber jacket made in China?

A wall poster of Trump as Superman?

Or a poster of Trump as King David?

What about the Revised Standard Bible

with a fake calf-cover made in China?

Trump suit manufactured in Mexico?

Maybe Trump-eyeglasses made in China?

Is there such a thing as Trump Tupperware?

How much is a dozen eggs from DT?

Will Canada be the 51st state?

Will Denmark sell Greenland to the US?

Shall I be buried in a MAGA shirt?

The Trump Commandments 

·      You shall have no other world leader to compare to me.

·      You should purchase my Bible with my signature.

·      If you malign my reputation, I will sue you into poverty.

·      Thou shalt not mention Jeffrey Epstein in my presence.

·      If your father or mother is a Democrat, forget about them.

·      You may murder immigrants for any reason.

·      You may do your neighbor’s wife, but don’t fuck with me.

·      If you don’t send me donations, there will be repercussions.

·      You may covet my billions, but not the billions of Elon.

·      Lying is merely a metaphor for a good cause.